Overview
Develop a memorialization policy before a suicide death occurs. Include this policy in the school’s crisis plan.
Schools need to balance compassion for grieving students while reducing the risk of suicide contagion.
Schools should treat all deaths the same way. Having one approach for memorializing a student who died of cancer or in a car accident and a different approach for a student who died by suicide can be deeply painful to the student’s family and friends.
When possible, schools should meet with the deceased student’s friends and coordinate memorialization with the family to develop a meaningful, appropriate approach. Consider the religious and cultural needs of all involved.
Funerals and memorial services
If a funeral or memorial service occurs during school hours, maintain regular school hours. Follow regular school protocols for dismissing students to attend funerals. Consider coordinating with the family and funeral director to arrange for mental health professionals to attend the service. At least one school representative should attend.
Schools should strongly encourage parents/guardians whose children express an interest in attending the funeral to attend with them. This provides not only emotional support, but also an opportunity for parents/guardians to monitor their children’s response, to begin a discussion, and to remind them that help is available.
Spontaneous memorials
It’s common for students to create a spontaneous memorial by leaving flowers, cards, poems, pictures, stuffed animals, or other items in a place closely associated with the student, such as their locker, classroom seat, or the site where the student died.
The school’s goal should be to balance the students’ needs to grieve with that of limiting the risk of inadvertently glamorizing the death. If spontaneous memorials are created on school grounds, school staff should monitor them for messages that may be inappropriate (e.g., hostile or inflammatory) or that indicate students who may be at risk.
Offer creative options for students who want to grieve their classmate. Respond with sensitivity and compassion. For example, schools can make poster boards and markers available so that students can gather and write messages. Place the posters in an area that students can avoid if they don’t want to participate (e.g., not in the cafeteria or at the front entrance).
Memorials may be left in place until after the funeral (or for up to approximately five days), after which the tribute objects may be offered to the family. Let the school community know that the posters are going to the family so that people do not think they were disrespectfully removed. For example, post a statement near the memorial on the day before and then the day it will be taken down.